Your daughter is going to be a flower girl. In addition to being the most adorable member of the bridal party, she—and you—have some pretty important responsibilities. If your daughter has never been to a wedding or doesn't know anyone who's ever been a flower girl, she probably doesn't understand exactly what's going on. She's bound to be excited once you tell her about her beautiful dress, the pretty flowers, and the importance of her job. So before you wonder, "What did I get myself into?" here's a sneak peek of what you and your daughter need to know. For more on these subjects, as well as "Practice Makes Perfect," "The Bridal Shower," "Getting Ready," "The Walk," "Photos," "Standing Still," and "The Reception", purchase Fiona the Flower Girl.

The Dress: Be prepared to pay for the dress—it's part of agreeing to be in the wedding. Prices vary depending on the designer, fabric, and size, but feel free to make some suggestions. A bride choosing on looks alone may overlook a scratchy collar or a heavy dress. Your daughter might have to go for fittings to make sure the dress is comfortable and not too long, to avoid tugging or tripping during the ceremony. Floor-length dresses can be tricky, especially if your daughter is younger or simply not used to walking in something so long. If you're worried, suggest shortening the hem by an inch or two.

The Accessories. Here's a checklist you can use to make sure your flower girl has everything she needs for the big day:

Shoes: Often overlooked, shoes that don't fit will literally hurt your child's performance. Get them at least a month in advance, and have her break them in for a few hours each week (just around the house) to make sure she's comfortable. In a pinch, at a casual warm-weather wedding, you might suggest that she walk barefoot. It looks adorable!

Jewelry: Small pearl studs for pierced ears, or a simple bracelet, are perfect for the wedding day. It's best to keep the jewelry minimal—and make sure your daughter knows it's not the time to break out her favorite large, plastic ring.

White Underwear.: Colors or polka dots easily show through a light dress, so white is the best bet.

Hair and Makeup: Is the bridal party getting fancy updos for the event? Ask if your daughter can go to the salon, too. Even if the stylist only brushes her hair and clips in a barrette or two, it will help her feel included. If your daughter is wearing a ring of flowers in her hair, make sure it's secure and won't fall over her eyes every few steps! Try to minimize her time in the salon chair; if she has to sit still for two hours the morning of the wedding, it may be hard for her to focus on the more important parts of the day. If you choose not to have a professional do her hair, be prepared with a comb and light hairspray for styling and touch-ups. Also, if you're planning to schedule a haircut, make it a week or two before the wedding to avoid harsh bangs and choppy layers.

The Flowers: Flower girls don't necessarily toss petals; instead, she might hold a pomander (a ball of flowers suspended from a ribbon for her to clutch), a basket of flowers, or a mini-bouquet that matches the bride's.
Scattering a perfect blanket of petals is tricky, so if that's what the bride wants, someone should spread them before the ceremony. Then the flower girl can just sprinkle a few more petals on top. If the petals won't be spread beforehand, you may need to give your daughter a few petal-tossing pointers. Try a few practice steps while you explain how many petals to toss; otherwise, you could end up with a trail of single petals or a burst of petals at the beginning with none left over for the rest of the aisle. Have your daughter grasp three or four petals at a time (like gently picking up a handful of cotton balls) and drop them with each step.
Also, make sure the basket isn't too heavy for your daughter to carry, especially if she's young!

After It's All Over: Talk about the big day with your flower girl, and make sure she has some photos so she can look back on the experience as she grows older. A special day like this will hopefully become a very clear childhood memory for her, one that she'll enjoy for years to come.

Purchase Fiona the Flower Girl

Copyright © 2008 by .
Illustrations © 2008 by Lorena Siminovich